Network -verb and why I loath the word. My personal feeling is that nothing is more overused and misunderstood than the word network -verb. I don't like to use it but have to admit, I don’t have a decent replacement word and even if I did, I don’t have a way to create enough buzz to get everyone to change.
Maybe the word isn’t bad, it’s just been misused and attached to some shady behaviors. Network -noun is ok. I can have a network of family, a network of friends, a network of business acquaintances, and so on. I’d rather use the word circle because I think it’s warmer and more inclusive. A circle of friends sounds nice, but you can’t circle like you can network. “I’ll circle with a few people and get you a name(when I’m not so dizzy).”
I guess it’s the way some people network that bothers me (and we know who they are).
There’s the secretive networking person, all take, no give. “Hi. My name is…… I’m doing a little networking in the industry” which means “You don’t know me but I’m hoping you can give me some names that I can talk to. I might be able to get a company to hire one of them and make some money. Nope, sorry , can’t tell you the company, that’s confidential and I don’t trust you but you can trust me. Who do you know? ”
Then there’s the possessive networking person, it’s all mine. Ever ask something like, “I need to do a presentation on interviewing, who should I talk to?” Then you get this reply, “Let me check with some people in my network.” Which usually means, “ I have this list of people, people you don’t have and that gives me power. I’m not about to give you their names but I might check with them and get back to you. That way, you’ll owe me. Bow before the network king/queen while I laugh at you. Silly little unconnected person.”
When people call me to network, I try to do the right thing. “Hey Brad, I need someone to talk to about possibly filling a position doing XYZ. ” Then I can say, “Call Bob, tell him I recommended him because he is a great guy (he’s in my circle).” Or when you tell me you need to do a presentation on interviewing, I can respond, “Let me connect you with Susan , I send all my friends to her , she’s an interview expert (she’s in my circle).”
To be good at networking, you need to be honest, trusting and most importantly willing to give. Don’t misuse the word to try to get something without being willing to give something. The more you give the more you get.
Meanwhile, make sure you take advantage of Linkedin to grow your network and JibberJobber to help manage your network. Hopefully, someday I can help you and better yet, add you to my circle.
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